so many starts but not enough finishes

Man, I write a hell of a lot more than you see posted--drafts filed up like abandoned dreams, sometimes never to be repeated or finished again, but the same thoughts are often swirling in themes. This morning's half start was on empathy, the lack of in our current society, and then I realize you came here, and if you have returned more than once it might be due to some kind of empathetic curiosity, a tangible pang felt because of something I have said. Or maybe you are morbidly curious as I sometimes find myself in observance of my own life, ready to steady yourself with thoughts of, well, at least I am not as fucked up as she is, at least I have a support system around me, or, my favorite, at the very least you are not me.

But I dig me, I mean, shit, I have lived a life and though I have somehow found myself stuck in the quicksand of middle age and its endeavors without children---I can do whatever I want almost any time I want, provided I have the resources to get me there. Oh, the caveat of the how, but the ...