In a state of panic, it’s hard not to see, huh

I have decided something for myself, too, see?

Remember when back a few weeks when I wasn’t eating, and didn’t have any real source of income?

Yeah, I know you remember. That time I spent crying to various fools on the phone about my doomed state of being.

I am not doing for anyone anymore, unless there are signs that it’s
worth it, that reciprocal action, an energy placed into my corner
that same, I do for you because I want to help you. Not that I do for you because you have to beg and claw and slap me
to get any attention.

Nah,  I did lots of stuff out of my own goodness of being, a
resonating sound that made it not a chore, not an effort, not even
something
I didn’t want to do. I like helping people, and whatever push or encouragement I can give along the way should be satiated.

So yeah, being that I have done that and not too many of you extremely
disgustingly selfish people could really attest to anything else…I
have known some beauties, but those are the ones that never wanted
anything of me, never asked.

I just wonder why it is that sometimes I look around me, and there are
these people inside tiny circles that I observe, spinning and twisting
around wondering why it is they feel so alone.

But essentially we get out what we put in.

And for now, I have put in enough.

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