7 days from my possible end of existence

Man it's gonna totally suck if I die because I think finally people are starting to want to pay attention or listen to me. I am the most interesting person you don't know.

I kid, there are absolutely people wayyy more interesting than me but I've got my own opinions on most things-I feel in some ways I'm looking down the barrel of a gun, but then the other part of me is there to whisper--shhh--you have gone through this so many times before you have all the practice. It's just a root canal, no it's just basic maintenance. I do think this sucker will be the last--my general paranoia is around a pacemaker, I'll admit. I do not want one of those, not just because I'm on a payment plan for a PEMF mat I would have to get rid of quickly but because I REALLY don't feel I want to add myself to another Facebook group to be ignored inside. My heart rate is not great-phone's telling me for just about a year it's been trending below 50bpm a lot of the time--looks like the summary range for the past year was 37-204--now that 204 probably hurt ...