I have been thinking a lot lately about relationships, what defines them, and what makes good ones, and I have come to a few comfortable places in my head I had no ability to previous to actually putting effort into it. A friend today asked me what I thought about marriage, and I am slightly…
So everything is still normal, nothing has fallen down or ripped itself apart in my presence, so I feel accomplished. J and I did a little reorganization and cleaning of my humble abode. I talked with him about new paint colors, which should either brighten or make my life more difficult. Because I know not…
Oooohhhh. I molest this phrase with exceeding frequency, in my mind. I can’t believe how powerful music can be to me sometimes; and mostly when I turn a deaf ear to all sounds. Except the city whipping by me at an alarming pace. I can hear that, because not to hear that is to not…
so I logged into that crush thing to see who had/has a crush on me. And that is 6 people. huh. I figured my shit wasn’t too well read, though. I have been inspired by a book by Fernando Pessoa, The Book of Disquiet. It’s a lovely selection and it’s amazing that people have existed…
Do you ever think you’re the only one that gets it, the only one who has real eyes to see, the only one who can feel the hurt that burn and cuts like a knife? I think most people are swimming in their own self-encased perpetual thinkdoms, where we all think we know more than…
So I decided to stop writing those pathetic little give-ins anywhere anymore. Things have a way of manifesting when you put all of your thoughts and energies into them. So I have decided not to give in to the obvious difficulties presented to me and just move on. The thing is, my mini-breakdowns are gonna…
So I was speaking to a good friend of mine about how he refuses to read my journal entries simply because I should be able to tell him what is going on in my life, without him having to read it. My response was: Well, I wrote it so I wouldn’t have to tell you….
Now, I have been known to have some pretty decent conversations while intoxicated or messed up, but I have never really drunk dialed at all. That is, except for last night. I am one of those squishy drunks that tends to get a little overly sentimental while sloshy. I have never ever been mean, and…
My imagination is over-active, and this is the most apparent in my sleep state (very close to the waking point). I have had dreams of violence, murder, mayhem, and just death since I was no less than 5. When I was that young I was usually getting eaten by tigers, lions, or whatever creature came…
So as we were walking by F’s old job yesterday, I coaxed him into going in, you know, just to see. I didn’t think that he would be capable of paying the rent on my place alone unless he got another job, which was not unfounded. Now he will be working 5 days per week…
